Sometimes I wish I had one of those dials in my back where I could shorten or lengthen my hair by twisting it, like some of those Barbie dolls had in the late 60’s. My hair just seems to grow at exponential levels in the spring. This of course necessitates paying a visit to Clara, my hair burner. I like Clara just fine, but it’s such a pain in the keester getting it cut all of the time. I find it boring.

I used to have long hair that flowed down my back. My Mom liked long hair on me but never let me wear it down and cut my bangs to the point where, if you looked at me head on and didn’t see the pony tail down my back, you’d think I was a boy. I never saw the point in having long hair if you couldn’t wear it down. What I didn’t realize was the reason she kept it long was so that she could tie it back. It was long for years.

I had it cut once in the 80’s for a modeling job I did. Horst of Austria was shooting his first television commercial for Aveda Hair products and I was hired to do the commercial. Yes, I was the first Aveda girl. It was a cute cut.

Well, I used to have it until the airline got ahold of me and chopped it off  to a very boring and hard-to keep-out-of-my-eyes Prince Valiant hair cut. Here’s a photo of my Dad and I at my Flight Training Graduation.

I would have scanned these photos but I’d miss staring at my clean floor, so I just held them up to the camera on my Mac. Sorry about the heavy makeup and bright red lipstick, but when it came to regulation makeup back then, that’s what they wanted.

Cute? I suppose so, but it was just short enough where I couldn’t tie it back, so it drove me nuts. I had long hair so that I could tie it up into a bun and get on with my life. Boring? Yes. Practical? Oh yeah! I finally understood that what my Mom did with my hair when I was a kid made perfect sense.

I don’t like to drive either. Boring. Or terrifying. It all depends on the time of day and what part of I95 you happen to be on. I equate my hair to my floor.

My floor can be beautiful. Or terrifying. It all depends on how messy my Greys happen to have been lately and whether or not I’ve had the time to hot mop it. Last night, I had the ambition to hot mop the living snot out of it. I used gallon after gallon of very hot rinse water which began as a very horrifying dark gray with tiny bits of vegetables floating in it to a very near to clear appearance. After I was done, I simply walked around and stared at it trying to cement its shiny and squeaky clean appearance to my memory because I knew that by tonight it would have that lived-in look once again. But that’s the price you pay when you have birds in the house. They poop, throw stuff around, throw their food at the walls and heave stuff over the side of their play gyms just to watch it drop to the floor. This is a section of my floor before the Greys had their breakfast:

This is the same section after breakfast:

Broke my heart having to get the birds out and feed them this morning. I wanted to stare at the floor some more and try and remember it the way it was.

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