There are some words and phrases I dislike immensely. I don’t know why, I just do. I love words. I love language and the printed word. I’ve been spotted reading the dictionary. I buy books by the ton which is inspiring me to think about getting an iPad if just for the savings on buying books. ( I am of course, using this as an excuse to justify the purchase of this sexy little device.) But when I see the poor little word misused, misspelled, bent into agonizing ways that supposedly suits the purpose of the writer, I simply go a little nutty. Sarah Palin’s misuse and “invention” of the word, “refudiate” drove me right off the edge. Here are a few words and phrases that give me pause:

“Side-kick:”  This is a person’s assistant or close associate. This is not a friend or relative.

“Vow:”  I notice this one used a lot by tabloid newspapers usually in a story about something Oprah says she’s going to do, like lose weight. It’s a solemn promise and should probably be reserved for nuns.

“Dupe:”  This has three meanings. One is short for “duplicate.” The others are a noun and a verb having to do with a deception or trick and the victim of such. It irritates me.

“Think outside the box:”   The people who use this phrase rarely do.

“The customer is always right:”  Now this is just plain wrong. An impressive percentage of my customers are so wrong half the time, I don’t know how they got a driver’s license.

“Parrot Mommy”: I know this shouldn’t bother me, but it’s the “Mommy” part that irritates me. Growing up, my Mother was known around my home as “The Big M.”

“Wack:”  As in “That’s just wack.” It says absolutely nothing. Totally non-descriptive. Lazy.

“Sassy:” I simply hate it. The origin was from the mid 19th century. It should have stayed there.

Confusing, “Their,” “they’re” and “there:”  God help me I’ve seen it everywhere. So there.

Excessive apostrophe use: God help us. I’ve seen this sprinkling of apostrophe’s on sign’s, on menu’s, on truck’s and in blog’s. God save us all from this horrible habit. And yes, I put those apostrophes there on purpose to make my point. I realize they are all wrong.

Confusing, “Your” and “You’re.”  This is a double fault. It’s wrong and includes an apostrophe. It causes me physical pain when I see this.

“Errant:”  An editor replaced this word for the word “misplaced” in an article I wrote. I almost strangled him, told him if he ever pulled that again, I’d never write for his little newsletter again. I didn’t. The newsletter went down in flames. I didn’t mind.

“I’m your biggest fan:” I happen to love certain things, admire certain people for what they’ve written, done, created, performed, etc. But I don’t get crazy about it….At least in the presence of the particular person I admire.

“LOL”  I grudgingly must use this on occasion. But it’s taking over actually writing.

I feel better now. Thank you for allowing me time to get that off of my mind.